I was stumbling around a London hotel room at 6am when I heard the news about Tiger Woods being involved in a car crash and his wife had to smash open the window with a golf club to get him out. Less than a week later, it turned out she was probably trying to twat him with it, after his murky ‘personal life’ came out. Apparently, Tiger has been doing more ‘coming’ than the occupants of a backstreet porn-studio!Yes, the worlds best golfer (yes, A GOLFER) has finally been caught by his wife of 5 years, after a (alleged) string of affairs over the last few years. With the tabloids being tabloids, nobody seems to know how many women he’s knocked off in the short time he’s been married. Apparently, it’s easily into double figures as it’s emerged that Tiger has a taste for an ‘adult actress’ or two. I can hear them now ‘Ooooooh Tiger, you’re such an animal!’ (Obviously puns aren’t my strong point!)
Now I know this is sad for his family and you’ve got to feel for them, but who would have expected a golfer as famous as Tiger to be involved in this kind of carry on? True, we’ve had Nick Faldo but that’s like saying we’ve got a bike and the yanks have a Ferrari. This just proves why women go for men like Tiger – the money and fame. I’m sorry girls (if any read this) but its true, forget about the ‘GSOH’ bollocks. As long as the blokes wallet is fat enough, it doesn’t matter about anything else. Shallow, that’s all you are!
Sexism aside, Roger Federer must be shitting himself. First his Gillette TV ad team-mate Thierry Henry made himself into a villain by using his hand in the build up to France’s goal against Ireland in the World Cup play-off match, now fellow ‘close shaver’ Tiger has been in more holes than one of his golf balls. The ‘Curse of Gillette’ exists, I’m telling you!
It should be interesting to see what becomes of this story but it’s only going to get worse as the world’s gutter press have stuck their noses in. Expect Tiger’s mistresses to star in a string of reality shows, perhaps all at the same time. Tiger’s Mistresses? I can see it now, a big-brother style show with the winner being the one who is the most bitchiest. Wonder if the prize of a night of passion with another golfer, erm…Colin Montgomery will go down well?
Fair play to Tiger though, the last two weeks have done more for the image of golf than anyone wearing any ‘wacky’ outfit could ever do!






